What are your Favorite ways to Transmute fear?

 “What are your favorite ways to transmute fear?”

Another fabulous question, where the simple answer is through Mature and Unconditional Love, but y’all know how we do it around here, so let’s provide a more detailed and scientific answer, bringing us to the topic of Defense Mechanisms. Why? Because transmuting fear can be done in many ways, all ranging from negative to positive methods and defense mechanisms covers that spectrum. It’s important to know both the dark and light aspects, so we can be aware of what we might be doing wrong and replace them with healthier manners that will enable you to properly evolve. 

 

Before we dive deeper, I’d like to give you a quick synopsis on the id, ego and superego as they pertain to defense mechanisms. You’ve probably heard of these terms in psychology where they teach about consciousness through many branches. Currently, we will be looking through the psychoanalytic lense which organizes your psyche into 3 parts.

 

First we have the Id, which is the part of ones psyche containing all basic urges and is what drives you to satisfy instinctual needs for pleasure such as hunger or sex. As an infant this libido is very uncontrollable, since the ego is still young, inexperienced and without any skills to manage the inner surge of energy. As you grow older into later stages of life, your ego develops tools to maturely or immaturely direct this life force.

 

Then there’s the Ego, who is an expression of you as an individual and includes ones attitudes, values and interests. The ego enables you to perceive, reason, problem solve and navigate reality. It’s your unique and physical expression within our universe and has a huge role in adjusting instinctual desires of the id to match ethics of the superego.

 

Finally, the Superego, who has the role of a moral compass and acts as the egos conscience when the ego is deciding how to properly operate in the world. The superego helps the ego correctly manage urges of the id. The superego’s ethical stances are influenced and shaped by our parents and society at large and may therefore differ in relation to what culture or circumstances you’re at in life.

 

You never want to have too much or too little involvement from any of these parts. If your id is too much, you’ll become a savage with no regard for others, but if there is no id you’ll have no life force to get you motivated. Even if your superego is too much you’ll never evolve because you’re setting unrealistic standards that your ego can’t keep up with at that particular moment, ending up in it wanting to give up. If there’s not enough of the superego you’ll excuse abhorrent and destructive behavior. The ego isn’t your enemy either, sadly it has been misrepresented. The problem is usually an ego who has been programmed the wrong and complete immature way. The goal is to have a light self-aware, and mindful ego, that is mature enough to face objective truth and consistently adapt to change. Your ego’s intention should be to serve the soul and you do that through freedom-based thinking, feeling and education.

 

A great way to illustrate these terms is by thinking of the id as the devil on your shoulder and the superego as the angel, and your ego as the mediator of the two. With that, here’s a simple example. You’re walking through the park and suddenly get hungry. Your hangry id is barking at your ego: “Jeez, we didn’t have breakfast this morning and it’s already lunch time; feed me, NOW!” The super ego makes its presence known by agreeing, “you should definitely eat, the id is right about that, without nutrition you can’t survive or be a functioning human.” In response the ego decides to look around and searches for a place to eat, spotting two food stands. One serving fruit and another unlimited hot dogs. Right away the id jumps in “I vote for hot dogs, infinite hot dogs hot dogs hot dogs, yum yum yum” the superego responds “uhm I don’t think so, that’s not healthy for you in the long run and you’ll get a belly ache with all that junk food. Go get a beneficial portion of fruit; fruit fruit fruit.” At this point the ego must make a decision and based on many factors including your upbringing and societal conditions you’ll decide. If you choose fruit, great! Both the id and superego have been equally satisfied but if you decide to binge on hot dogs, then you’re going to deal with some consequences in the form of uncomfortable anxieties. Most of the time you’ll accept and process these feelings, forgive yourself, learn to not eat an unlimited number of hot dogs in the future and move on, but other times, the resulting emotions may be too much to handle for the ego. Now this is what brings us to defense mechanisms.

Defense mechanisms are ways your ego deals with overly uncomfortable feelings, thoughts or circumstances that may arise when the demands of one's desires clash with constraints of reality and our own moral standards. This is where the answer to the question: “What are your favorite ways to transmute fear?” resides. 

Before answering personally, I want to list the most common defense mechanisms that have been discovered. More can be found online, but these are the most basic mechanisms and cover pretty much the whole gamut of maladaptive to adaptive strategies. You can get a sense of what’s what as I list them with examples. 

1.    Denial – refusal to accept objective reality or fact 

Ex: an individual has a drinking problem but refuses to acknowledge it 

2.    Regression – reverting to childlike behaviors from earlier stages of development

Ex: an adult receives a speeding ticket and as a result has a childish temper tantrum   

3.    Projection – attributing one’s own qualities onto someone or something else when it’s not true about that person or thing but a reflection of the accuser

Ex: a cheating spouse accuses their partner of being unfaithful when they’re not

4.    Reaction Formation – expressing the opposite of ones true motives

Ex: a worker hates her boss but emotes overly positive feelings to the employer

5.    Displacement – redirecting feelings of someone towards another

Ex: someone is bullied but realistically can’t stand up to the abuser and as a result takes out their frustrations on a weaker subject such as the family pet

6.    Rationalization – justifying painful outcomes through logical reasoning 

Ex: a person asks their crush out but gets rejected and then makes an excuse by explaining after the fact that they “weren’t” interested anyways

7.    Repression – unconsciously blocking difficult thoughts or feelings

Ex: somebody gets bit by a snake at a young age and develops amnesia of that event to cope with what occurred but later has unexplainable fears of serpent like objects

8.    Suppression – consciously pushing unwanted thoughts away

Ex: someone with a terrible upbringing smokes weed to forget while at a family party but ends up “accidentally” breaking one of the picture frames of the whole family

9.    Sublimation – channeling unacceptable thoughts, feelings and behaviors into more socially accepted ones

Ex: an artist creates art, in the form of humor, dance, and poetry to deal with uncomfortable outcomes of existence. 

 

Once again, these defense mechanisms are unconscious methods your ego uses to alleviate uncomfortable feelings associated with being. The techniques your ego unwittingly gravitates towards utilizing are, I repeat, taught by your parents or societal environment. Unfortunately, most of us were not raised to maturely or properly deal with our emotions growing up, but don’t be discouraged. Neuroplasticity and epigenetics are a real thing, and the best way to stop falling victim to immature habits is by becoming aware of them. Because when you recognize and make the unconscious conscious, you have the power to choose differently. It’s not always easy, nor is it an overnight transformation that will yield success right away, because change like this comes in increments, but with self-love in the form of compassion, perseverance and patience; it is without a doubt possible. I am proof of that, which leads me to answer the question 

“What are your favorite ways to transmute fear?”

There used to be a dark period when I fell victim to all the defense mechanisms mentioned. At a young age whenever I would cry my father would shun me away and having emotionally neglectful parents (not their fault, as their parents weren’t any better) this taught me to push anything negative down. I was completely unaware of objective reality and what I truly felt leading to constantly running away from any sensation that wasn’t joyful or positive. Eventually it all caught up and came crashing down leading me with no choice but to face the truth. Studying psychology in college helped immensely and provided an understanding of how valuable and freeing sublimation is. It took about a decade after that to reprogram old behaviors and I’m still working on maintaining a healthy relationship with all feeling. Now I am proud to share that my favorite ways to transmute fear for mind, body and soul/spirit is by

·      Having a vision to strive for that satisfies your inner child and brings you peace

·      Becoming aware of one’s dreams, among other things, since they can bypass the ego, they are a reliable way your unconscious can communicate with you through cryptic symbolism to let you know how you objectively feel

·      Cultivating magic and using it as a tool for a greater good

·      being around horses. Don’t even have to ride them, grooming or just to be around them brings serenity and strength. The presence of animals and nature in general is very grounding and such a great transmuter of fear.

·      writing or journaling, seriously, whether it’s a diary journal, gratitude journal, fun facts journal, poetry journal, joke journal, dream journal, dictionary journal, any type of journal really, is super therapeutic. Writing down thoughts, facts, and creative material is good for your mental health.

·      Drawing, doodling, taking pictures, making videos and creating music

·      Crying, letting it all out in the shower really helps but crying in general is very cathartic, don’t keep it in; release and feel the message 

·      Sharing your challenges with others and how you overcame them, or listening to others do the same 

·      laughing, experiencing wholesome moments and genuinely connecting with other individuals who have your best interest at heart. Well-intentioned and real people who set you straight with the objective truth but also remind you to not be so hard on yourself

·      moving and exercising, in the form of dance, biking, skating, skiing, rollerblading, riding/training horses, swimming, going for a walk, stretching or doing yoga

·      Cooking and eating healthy meals for yourself and others

·      Learning new things and consuming nourishing content. This is vital as in doing so you discover more, not only about the world but also yourself, which enables a smoother existence.

·      Explore and discover new places out in the world or within (past life regression or communicating with spirit guides)

·      Treatment, whether in the form of therapy, shadow work, hypnosis, acupuncture, massages, medicine or relaxing baths that help you cleanse negative energies

·      Meditating or doing focused breathwork, including wim hoff and holotropic breathing techniques.

 

    That’s about it. Most of these are mindful activities that either help you face feelings of fear head on by yourself/with the help of others or sublimate and discover their meaning through activities. Keep in mind, sometimes I revert to old and immature habits, and that’s totally fine, we’re all human here, but if you’re finding new and mature ways to replace the old ones, and improving, even a little bit, that’s all that matters. Please remember, these are my methods collected over a decade, I don’t use them all at once, rather pick and choose when one is needed or available based on intuition. Not all of it is going to resonate with you and most likely I am missing some fear transmuters that many of you use. If there is something you’d like to suggest, please don’t hesitate to share as I am always open to new ways of metamorphosing fear. At the end of the day, you must figure out what works to heal you on a deeper level. Once you find your personal ways of achieving that light frequency, no amount of fear can ever stop you; at some point, it’ll only strengthen your impetus since you’ll always have your toolbox of fear modifiers reminding you of the healing and transformational power of unconditional love. Once you’ve made it there, any arduous challenge life brings only empowers you.

             

I hope this brought you some value! Please be advised to do your own research if you want to expand on the concept of defense mechanisms. This is all very simplified, but there are a lot more examples online that go further in depth on everything. Either way, thank you so much for reading! Much Love and Peace to you All!